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After a holiday with baby, comes the time to leave ... You resume work and your toddler returns to the nursery or the nanny. The advice of Anne Gatecel, psychologist, to prepare and live better this separation.
Assume the moment of departure
- He jumps for joy in the nanny's arms, without a look for you? Or, on the contrary, he sobs and clings to your legs? The moment of separation is not always easy and often causes the appearance of a small lump in the throat ... We've all been there!
- But basically, there is nothing disturbing: your child is only expressing emotions, happy or sad, and it is very good sign. He has the right to be angry, to fear a long day without you, to wonder if you will come back.
- If he's shedding a lot of tears, take the time for a big hug and a few words: "Your nanny will take care of you and comfort you, and tonight we'll be together again." he will find his bearings, or create others, and the separation will become easier.
Maintain a good understanding with the person who keeps it
- A crucial point: it is because he feels that you appreciate this person that he can accept to stay with her without too much apprehension. The way you speak to her, in front of him, therefore matters a lot.
- In the morning, when you leave it, privilege a cordial exchange with her, a short story of the evening of your toddler (what he ate, what he played ...) rather than to list a list of instructions! And if it is at home that he goes on the pot for the first time, rejoice, you did not miss anything! On the contrary, you have succeeded in creating an atmosphere of full confidence that benefits your little one.
Heal the reunion
- The moment of reunion is as important as that of separation: they are two sides of the same coin. When you return for your child, let him decide the tempo, even if he drags a little to come and kiss you. He may need a little delay to stop the activity he has undertaken. No doubt he also wants to be a little desired!
- Returning home, too, try to leave time to time, even to bed your child half an hour later: the bath, the meal, the story before sleep are steps that he needs. Every night, he needs his cash of presence and attention to succeed more easily in separating the next morning.
Also read on Popi: Changing the guard mode, how to prepare it?
Interview by Isabelle Gravillon, for the Parents Popi notebook
Popi, the toddler magazine to discover at your newsstand